Solutions to kidnapped children in Africa

Are you as tired as I am of Africa taking and selling slaves?  Here are some suggestions about what could be done, other than giving speeches and tweeting hash tags.

1.  Go to the auctions with a bag of money and buy them back.  300 girls x $300 each = $90,000.  Double that for waste involved in any government program and you have a bargain.  Big mouthed government oligarchs can scrape this together from their coffee funds, or reducing the Wookie’s next vacation by only 8 hours.  Of course this will lead to the same girls being abducted every 60 days and an engraved invitation being sent to you for the next auction.

2.  Go to the auctions and kill all the auctioneers, all the slave sellers, AND ALL THE SLAVE BUYERS.  You will never be invited to another auction.  But then you probably weren’t invited to this one.  This will cost a little more but will see a lot less recidivism.

3.  Offer bounties.  Pay $1,000 for each girl that is rescued, no questions asked.  Michelle and Oprah could fund the bounties out of their own pockets, if they care that much.  Oh… but they don’t.  They only care about using it to “raise awareness” that can lead to fundraising and using your money.  They like feeling good about taking the moral high ground without the bothersome problem of rearranging their travel and entertainment schedules.

4.  Raise a volunteer militia.  Send out an invitation to every big mouthed politician and media outlet asking them to put their own lives and safety where their big mouths are.  The US military will provide one retired Colonel to lead them, all the guns and ammo they can carry, food, medical support, Air support, and training facilities. Give them a hero’s welcome when they return.  But this will never work.  Everyone knows that militias are racist and would never rescue black children.  Or militias are libertarian and would never rescue Africans.  The way to sell it to the racists is that they get to kill blacks, and no limits!

5.  Spread the rumor that the slavers are Jewish.  Then the Nigerian government will become outraged and send their own army out to exterminate the bad guys.  And the UN will send a strongly worded letter of condemnation and a few hundred “peacekeepers” from other African countries.  This will of course drive demand for child prostitutes higher.

Mali patrol group

6.  Give a thousand M-16s and a few palates of ammo to these people and a message:  Go take them.



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About Professor Hale

Currently living in Virginia
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23 Responses to Solutions to kidnapped children in Africa

  1. Res Ipsa says:

    Grant me a letter of marque. I’ll go. Under law full circumstances, I bet you cash money that you’d have more American men who would saddle up for this fight than what are needed to fight it. On top of that, I’ll bet you that most of them would be white.

  2. Heresolong says:

    After I read the first sentence of #1, my immediate thought was that you don’t understand the laws of supply and demand, which I thought was odd, given how long I’ve been reading your blog. Then I read the next sentence and realized that you were making the same point I had immediately thought. Pay for something and you increase the supply.

    I think you could find plenty of men in this country who would go over there and form a militia/foreign legion type outfit. Wonder how effective that would be. Seems like the problem is the lack of freedom rather than the lack of a bunch of guys with guns. If the villagers had their own guns they wouldn’t have lost their girls. Or they might have been out stealing someone else’s girls.

    I don’t know much about merc armies and their effectiveness but I suspect that it wouldn’t be long before lefties found something to be upset about. Sort of like how Afghanistan was the “good” war until Bush started winning it.

  3. Heresolong says:

    Hey, where was that last picture taken? Why are a bunch of Nigerians carrying signs all printed in English? If they aren’t Nigerians, then it wasn’t “their” girls who were taken. WTW?

  4. Quartermain says:


    Nigeria was a British commonwealth and English is a neutral language that Nigerians can speak to be understood without using other tribal languages.

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  6. apollyon911 says:

    I like the idea of sending the women off to rescue the girls. No one appeared all that outraged when boys were killed (either shot or burned alive). Let the women show the world they are a force to be reckoned with. They can risk their lives to rescue the girls. No? That’s not what they had in mind?

  7. “Our girls….”

    This is amusing coming from Americans who would most likely be insulted if you insinuated that they should return to their ancestral homeland and yet claim a couple hundred people they’ve never met, live on the other side of the world that these Americans have never visited, and speak a completely foreign language as their own. Could there be any starker indication of black tribalism in America?

  8. sconzey says:

    @Heresolong: “Why are the signs in English?”

    If you’re reading it, it’s for you.

  9. pukeko60 says:

    Sopt arguing and send the special forces off on a slaver hunt. Every quarter if needs be. Good training and all.

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  11. deti says:

    Agree with Chris. If you really want the kids back, send the special forces out to get them. One would be hard pressed to find a more appropriate reason for military operations. Even the nutcase liberal Democrats can’t oppose military intervention. Hell, it’d be fun for some of our military folks. Just all in a day’s work for them. They’d do the job and be home in time for meat loaf and mashed potatoes.

  12. More appropriate?? How can any foreign intervention that has zero value for the american people be considered “appropriate”? The american people are the ones who paid for all that special forces training and would foot the rescue bill. What do they get out of it besides more blood?

  13. Darkheart says:

    Hell, it’d be fun for some of our military folks. Just all in a day’s work for them. They’d do the job and be home in time for meat loaf and mashed potatoes.

    Funny, they were saying the same thing when I left for Iraq in ’03.

    What astonishing naivete. Get them out of their comfort zone, and even redpillers become neocons.

  14. Yep. Pretty stupid when you think about it.

    “Hey! Let’s declare war on Islam and launch a voluntary never-ending crusade. What could go wrong”?

    And make no mistake. This would be a crusade, not a rescue. What happens after the girls are rescued? They go back to school and the white people fly home. But Nothing in Nigeria has changed, so the same girls get kidnapped again by the same people (or others just like them)..

  15. R Daneel says:

    So, Professor Hale, what is your solution? More kvetching?

    Yeah, thought so.

  16. WTW? I gave 6 ideas. Were you expecting 7?

  17. jamesd127 says:

    The problem is not that the girls are being denied education and given forced marriage. They are probably better off married. The problem is that these are largely Christian girls being sold to Muslim men – which is bad for Christian men, not bad for Christian girls.

    Solution: For each Christian girl kidnapped, kill n Muslim girls, where n is a sufficiently large number.

  18. Was this sarcasm. I can’t tell. It looks too evil to be serious. Since the moslems are killing plenty of christian boys the ratio of girls to boys is not unbalanced. So. Im not groking the point of your “solution”.

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  20. Aquila says:

    I joined the Army (naively, years ago) to protect the US, but the whole time I’ve been in I can now clearly see that I’ve been a pawn for insufferable fools and political agendas. I feel bad for the girls, I genuinely do, but can the US go abroad and heal every ill? We don’t storm into Eastern Europe to save white girls from the sex slave trade. We’re in Korea, where the US Army is the #1 patron of the Asian sex trade there and practically keeps the institution alive there by itself – and a lot of the women involved, probably most, are outright slaves tricked into coming to Korea with promises of careers by pimps. I am sure there are far more than 300 sex slaves in Korea, yet we’re concerned with about 300 in Nigeria, a 3rd world nation, on a continent where blacks enslaving blacks is pretty much par for the course. It’s going to cost millions to get those girls back – drones, Infantrymen, air support, etc. Why them and not other women? Why this problem and not, say, Rwanda back in the day, or Muslim’s slaughtering Christians in places like Sudan? What about John Quincy Adams who said America “…goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy?” If we get these girls “back,” it will be a good thing, but it won’t answer these questions. We will have once again used service members as pawns for some pet agenda. We will have sent men to a place where they will suffer, and a few may die, for a pet project.

  21. That’s the point. No one in public policy is willing to discuss the deeper issues regarding just what exactly IS American foreign policy this year and what are we willing to do to accomplish it. They are all about the emotion of “DO SOMETHING” and nothing about how this country is supposed to work. Long term, it doesn’t matter one bit if those girls are ever returned. They will still be living where they are living.

  22. Elspeth says:


    There are plenty of silly white liberal women adding #bringbackourgirls tweets to the conversation. Michelle Obama and those silly black American women in the pic above are just a smidgeon of what’s being offered.

    I am black and as much as I might hate what has happened to these young ladies, I don’t see these girls as “my girls”. I only see my girls as my girls.

  23. I have one girl. Instead of “bring them back” I would be saying “come and take her”. And of course I would not mind killing every last man who tries.

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